A coney island life poem evaluation rough draft

           In life you may never know exactly when your time will be up. You just know that eventually it will run out. So with that little time that you have you should make the best of it,and keep striving for more and never settle. "A Coney Island life" by James Weil teaches us to appreciate everything that life has given us but to always strive for more. So that when your time does run out you know that you will have achieved that brass ring.

          One of the main things that I got out of this poem is that we should be thankful for everything that we receive and achieve, because we don't know when we won't be able to do those things anymore. For example on the poem when he says "how many more times round I have left." In that he's telling us that he doesn't have that much time left and he wants us to make the most of the time we have left because he didn't. And he wants us to make the most of it so that we can feel more pleased when we pass and not feeling empty like him. When he says "Before the game is up." He is saying that when our time is up its UP and we don't have any second chances so we should me the most of what we have left and not live with any regrets.

         The main thing that I had gotten out of this poem is that we should always want more and never settle or give up. Because if we do we won't achieve anything in life and we won't be happy. But what he is trying to say when he says "Now arms filled with dolls I threw so much for." Is that he never gave up or even settled and for doing so he has recieved many awards and prizes. So that's what he wants us to do also. So that we can live a more happy and fun life. In the poem when he says "On roller coaster ups and downs."  This means that in life there are going to be times where you are going to be over joyed with happiness and also times of struggle and sadness but to always remember to enjoy the good times and work threw the bad and make the most of your life.

           Therefore, we should work hard dream big and never give up. And we should also appreciate everything that life offers us and take it because we never know when we will get that chance again. But most importantly we should make the most of our life and keep on moving forward to reach the brass ring.

portfolio questions

1. What piece of writing did you like best in my portfolio and why? 
2. What did you like about my portfolio and sharing and what would you like to see me improve on?
3. Which of the writing traits (ideas, organization, voice, word choice) do you feel was most successful for me?
4. Which of the traits of writing would you like me to improve on in the coming semester?

answer the questions above about my website

heres the link

 http://duncanslanguageartsportfolio.weebly.com/

KC3 Final Draft Essay

KC3 Essay (final draft)

               

              There are too much people coming to Hawaii and leaving their trash around everywhere. The overpopulation of this island is causing for more pollution and it is hurting not only our land but our water too. Hawaii is ranked 8th in beach water quality in the united states (out of 30 states). And as a 

result of this overpopulation there has been more trash in our ocean then there ever was centruies ago.

               Agricultural waste  or polluted run off is just one of the ways that we pollute the ocean with 

out even knowing it. The way that agricultural waste works is its based upon run off so when storm 

water or irrigation water washes pollutants off the island some contaminated materials gets taken 

away with it into the ocean, And those contaminated materials are the things that are killing our fish 

and getting them sick. And that why we see more and more "warning contaminated fish" signs. So 

now we need to be more careful on what we spill and leave on the floor and if we do spill things on 

the floor just be sure to clean it up right away.

              Household waste is also another huge problem we have here in Hawaii. Household waste is 

waste from things everyone has in their household like soda cans, plastics, food wrappers and so on. 

But these are things we use every day and thats what makes this such a big problem. Soda cans are 

probably one of the biggest factors because a lot of us drink soda or canned juices which are made 

out of aluminum. 20% of Americans drink at least one can of soda every day and if not everyone 

recycles then all of those cans will get into our ocean and hurt our wildlife and possible kill them. 

And with 1,360,301 people living in Hawaii alone that is not a good thing.

               We can avoid all of this by doing simple things like throw away our trash, recycling our 

cans, not littering, donate to an organization that protects or helps the ocean, and lobby your local 

politicians on on the issue. If we do these things we can make the beaches more beautiful like they 

once were and we will also be saving our marine life that are on tract to be almost gone by the middle of this century.

               Water pollution in Hawaii is the most dangerous thing to Hawaii's environment and it has to be fixed, because if its not then our future generations may not be able to swim in the amazing ocean 

like we do now. And thats one thing that i don't think anyone wants. And that we should try to stop 

our bad habits of polluting the ocean and start restoring it so that it could be as beautiful as it once

was centuries ago. 

Querencia Rough draft

               Sometimes I over think every thing and I just have too much on my mind. My head is filled with all the thoughts of the tons of homework I still have yet to do the essays due on Monday, the projects due on tuesday, the final exams on wednesday, and the drama and rumors spreading around school like a brush fire. I need to escape from all of this.
               It wasn't until 2 years ago that I found this special place of mine. My dad had signed me up for members at 24 hour fitness in pearlcity. It was a gift for me for my 12th birthday. I come here to practice my game in the basketball gym and to enjoy the warm and relaxing waters of the jacuzzi. all though those are the only two things I do here they are the only things I need right now.
               This place has done so much for me in these past two years. It helps me clear my mind and focus on what's right and what's  the right thing to do. It helps me with all the tough decisions I have to make. This is the place that I started my grind at because all the other parks by my house don't have lights or are dangerous to walk too. This is the place that I played my first pick-up game with men because no one that lives by my house plays basketball ball or takes it seriously. And that's only a few of the things that it has done for me. After school I try to finish my homework as fast as I can so I can go out the door and get there as soon as I can. Especially when I feel emotional. I beg my dad so much to take me when I don't want to walk there or when the sun goes down and I can't walk there that he sees me as a pesky fly at times.
               My love for this place and for this game is so great that its like a bond that cannot be broken no matter what. And this is not only my special place but it is my querencia.

Sensory Detail Paragraph

                  EER! EER! EER! The sound of the alarm burning my ears, making me go deaf.  I knew I was going to be nervous but I didn't think that I was going to be this frightened to start my first day of high school. . . as a freshmen.  My stomach was queasy and it didn't go away with a quick rub.  I just wanted to lie back down and curl up under my blanket, and wait the day out.  But, that all dissapated when I smelt my mom cooking up something delicious.  After I was all fed and the butterfly's calmed down a bit it was time to get ready.  I quickly rushed to the bathroom and closed the door and then locked it, just to be sure no one bothered me.  I washed my face with the ice cold water, as cold as the Arctic water.  Then brushed my teeth for at least five minutes, which left a fresh cool minty taste behind, better than having ten ice breakers mint.
                  I put on my freshest most cleanest t-shirt, khakis and socks and then picked the shoes that matched my outfit the best.  I heard the rumbling of the engine starting up and ran to pick up my bag and dashed for the door, slamming it shut with a rumbling clatter of metal against wood.  I hopped into the warm and cozy car and then headed straight for school.  The ride to school was a blur the only few things that I remember seeing was the bright orange sun peeking over the mountains, and the tall buildings of downtown flying past my car making me feel like I was the pilot of a spaceship.  As I gazed upon the school approaching faster than ever the queasiness returned, but worse than before.  I slowly unlocked and the opened the only barrier that separated me from school.  When I reached the sidewalk that lead to the school, I quickly looked around for someone that I knew.  Right when I made eye contact with the person I knew, all the queasiness and the fright from me weakened because it had loss the battle, and I knew I was going to be just fine.

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